How Should Postpartum Sexuality Be?

Sexuality after Caesarean section : Women who gave birth by Caesarean section or who have stitches in the vaginal canal can have sexual intercourse after the examination and control recommended by their doctors.

The general view is that it will take 6 weeks for a woman who has given birth to recover mentally and physically, that the heavy discharge that occurs during this period may cause difficulties, and that the first intercourse after birth can actually begin after the 40th day. 40 days is the period given for the uterus and vagina to recover, return to their former state, and for physical fatigue to decrease.

In fact, what we understand by the concept of "sexual intercourse" is important here. If we emphasize that touching, hugging, and kissing are among the most important ways to establish sexual intimacy after birth, we can say that it is appropriate to start sexuality immediately after birth.

What is important is that couples feel ready for sex, and this period may vary. Even if intercourse is postponed, starting sexual intimacy immediately after birth will be beneficial to the woman, the man, and the couple's relationship. Undoubtedly, this feeling of closeness and the positive impact on the couple's relationship will also contribute positively to the baby's development.

Does the postpartum period negatively affect sexuality?

Sexual life in postpartum: Postpartum is the physical and mental recovery period of the body after birth. Psychologically, the woman is in the process of adapting to the role of mother for the baby.

Taking care of a baby is a source of happiness for new parents, but it also involves unusual difficulties and is tiring. At the same time, the house has become crowded. It is undoubtedly difficult to have a pleasurable sexual experience during the postpartum period. There is also a risk that the woman will experience postpartum blues and develop postpartum depression.

Along with psychological processes, women also experience physiological changes. Postpartum hormonal changes and hormones released during breastfeeding can cause a decrease in a woman's sexual desire and arousal, and vaginal lubrication may be delayed or absent. Since human sexuality is not only determined by hormones but is also affected by social conditions, some women may not have any changes in their sexual lives. Undoubtedly, sexuality that can be maintained without problems allows a woman to feel desirable, attractive and liked again despite her changing body and has a positive effect on her mental health.

Researchers have found that women return to their pre-pregnancy sexual frequency within an average of 12 weeks after birth. It is generally accepted that couples who had enjoyable pre-pregnancy sexual lives also experience enjoyable sexuality during the postpartum period.  

Does the breastfeeding process affect sexuality in the postpartum period?

It can affect both positively and negatively. It is known that breastfeeding has numerous advantages for the child. Being able to provide these advantages strengthens the woman's perception of femininity, and feeling more "feminine" can increase sexual desire. It is also reported that the physical recovery process will be shortened in women who breastfeed. While some studies report that breastfeeding mothers return to their pre-pregnancy sexual desire and activity earlier, some researchers suggest that breastfeeding negatively affects sexual activity.

As long as breastfeeding continues, the hormone called prolactin remains high and it is known that this hormone can reduce sexual desire and delay vaginal lubrication. Pain during intercourse can be relieved by using a lubricating cream.

On the other hand, milk may come from the breasts during sexual intercourse, and overstimulation of the breasts should be avoided to prevent this from causing any problems.

What causes pain during intercourse in the postpartum period and is there a treatment?

Pain during sexual intercourse after birth , or rather pain during sexual intercourse (dyspareunia), is a common condition. Changing hormones reduce sexual desire, arousal decreases, and since decreased arousal causes little or no vaginal lubrication, intercourse becomes painful. Repetition of the pain experience increases reluctance, and since arousal and lubrication decrease when there is no desire, the vicious cycle continues. As can be understood, the condition is mostly physiological and improves spontaneously when hormones return to their previous levels, and pain is prevented by the use of lubricants during this temporary period. Pain during sexual intercourse after birth will actually decrease with prolonging intercourse, increasing stimulation, and increasing vaginal lubrication.

If you share the problem with your gynecologist, he/she will recommend a suitable hygienic lubricant. If the problem persists, it is important to seek expert help for differential diagnosis.

What can be recommended to women who avoid sexuality due to aesthetic concerns?

A woman who has aesthetic concerns due to weight gain, changing body, or who does not like herself may avoid sex and sexual intimacy after giving birth because she is worried that her husband will not desire her. A woman needs to know that she can still look attractive in this state, that she is still desirable as a woman, and she needs to get feedback from her husband on this issue.

It should be kept in mind that the man may also have difficulties with his new role, may feel excluded in the mother-baby relationship, may have concerns that it may not be appropriate to request sex from someone who has just given birth, and may also expect to be understood and supported. Sharing concerns will also bring about a solution to the problem.

How can couples cope with sexual problems that may develop after birth?

It should be kept in mind that the postpartum and postpartum period is a temporary period. First of all, it is important for the spouses to make an effort to continue sexual intimacy by foreseeing some difficulties starting from the pregnancy period and to make sexuality talkable. The process following the birth is the period when the spouses get used to their new roles and responsibilities. During this period, the help of the extended family is undoubtedly needed for the baby; the couple creating a living space at home despite the crowd, making an effort to be alone for a short time, and arranging the baby's own room will ensure the preservation of both the couple's relationship and sexual life.

Undoubtedly, the needs of the child are important, but considering the difficulties of this period, sexual pleasure is one of the most enjoyable ways to spend time for ourselves due to its easily accessible feature.